I'm 16 weeks pregnant with twins, whether I believe it or not. Although my mind isn't on board yet, my body is giving hints, like smack you in the face hints. It's time I take ownership of my pregnancy status, even though my body resembles a woman who has let herself go as in I drink beer constantly and don't give an f-.
Saturday, while shopping with my dear mama, I needed to sit my butt down after my lower back began hurting/cramping. The pain wasn't extreme but it was enough to warrant a response from yours truly as well as my ma-ma. Sunday, a lovely Mother's Day lunch with hubby, mom and m-i-l and grocery shopping was enough to take the wind out of my sails.
I spent yesterday in bed, reading, resting and eating - which was glorious (although not glorious enough to want to be on bed rest for weeks). Who knew Stephen King, a neck pillow and snacks in bed could be so fabulous? That evening I nearly passed out/threw up standing at my oven, stir frying vegetables (found out today from my OB/GYN that's normal -- my blood pressure likely fell). Sitting down didn't cure what ailed me but lying down on the couch made me feel better. I also felt like my throat was closing up and I couldn't breathe but that was likely a panic attack since the dizzy/nauseous feeling is what I felt before I had a partial seizure three years ago (only have had one in my life, thankfully, but I read those feelings are my triggers and shouldn't be ignored).
The first trimester I lacked energy and felt disgusting, inside and out. My body was slowly expanding and my stomach felt like a Tilt-a-Whirl. I felt like a scientist while trying to discover which foods wouldn't make me hurl. Now I'm into the second trimester and all I hear from veteran moms and opinionated Internet ramblings, the likes I should stop reading, is how this trimester is wonderful. Yes, I don't feel as disgusting as last trimester and I can eat a wider variety of foods (although some smells still make me want to hurl) but I'm realizing my body isn't what it used to be, not that I was a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model who worked out hours a day. My body is working for three and it's throwing hints to slow down, even if I feel well enough to go about my normal routine.
You see, I'm not your normal girl. I grew up daddy's favorite and a tom girl. My much older sisters didn't want much to do with me so I latched on to my closer-in-age brother, wanting to be just like him. When my parents needed someone to do hard labor (as we referred to it), I was in on the action. So, it's hard for me not to be one of the boys -- I'm Rosie the Riveter! However, I must remember I'm living for three, which is extraordinary! It would be easier if I had a substantial baby bump to showcase to the world but life isn't always easy!
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