Last night, I started this post on getting your twins to sleep through the night. Of course, afterwards, one of my boys awoke at 11 p.m. fussing up a storm. It reminded me babies are people: we have bad days, bad dreams and all sorts of things. So, one bad night shouldn't make me give up on the Holy Grail of Sleeping Through The Night!
My post:
If I told you my 5-month-old twins are crawling and can say "Mama," you would be jealous, right? You'd wonder what's wrong with your kid(s). Why is motherhood competitive? Well, don't worry because they can't crawl or talk but my babies can sleep through the night and have for a couple months. No, I don't mean for five hours at a time because that's crap. That's not sleeping through the night to me! That's a tease! My boys typically sleep 7 p.m. to 4 or 5 or even 6 a.m. (with the occasional 2 a.m. if there's a growth spurt afoot). No books were used, no wacky suggestions were explored ... I got to know my babies.
My oldest is typically a good baby so when I see his sleep tell (rubs his eyes) I put him down for a nap. As for his brother, I did wimpy cry-it-out for a couple months, putting him in another room in a pack 'n' play and letting him cry, only comforting him (don't pick your baby up!) every five minutes. It took time and sometimes I really, really wanted to pick up my whiny baby but I'm glad I didn't. I transitioned him to his crib when I thought he was ready and now that's where he naps. Yes, he occasionally fusses but it's usually for five minutes or less. Also, I put them down for a nap at the same time, every time.
From day one there is great concern over sleep. You sleeping, your babies sleeping, getting them to sleep more, getting them to sleep at the same time ... sleep, sleep, sleep. I read articles, blogs, asked friends, please oh please how can I get them to sleep?!? What did I learn? Every baby is different and I need to be patient.
I had my babies via C-section at 3 a.m. in the morning so I started this party with no sleep. Our hospital stay is a blur but then we ventured home and it wasn't that bad. They slept constantly, wanting to eat every 3 hours. Sometimes they woke us up to eat and sometimes we woke them -- I can still hear the sound of the alarm we used. It wasn't so terrible. I got used to this setup and that's when it changed.
They didn't sleep as much. They fussed, they whined and cried and my sleep tally diminished. My hormones dropped and I was a mess. Luckily my in-laws helped so we did Baby Roulette at night for a couple months (felt like a couple years). Baby A most likely wasn't sleeping well during this period because after 3 a.m., sometimes 2, he was trying to poop, grunting loudly. It was funny, annoying and sad all wrapped in one. His brother simply freaked out often and developed colic -- screaming for an hour or so. Every morning my in-laws would ask how my night went and I remember mumbling how I'd gotten an hour of sleep, sometimes two. Four hours of sleep in a row was Heaven on Earth.
It wasn't fun. I spent my days comforting a colicy baby and feeding, feeding, feeding. I felt like a zombie.
Around the three-month mark we (my husband and I) decided to go it solo. Days alone with my boys helped me discover who they are. I followed the saying: Sleep begets sleep. Slowly and surely they slept more during the night. Sorry if some of this is glazed over but, honestly, I blocked out the worst of it because my brain is kind.
My plan: I fill them up during the day, feeding them every three hours: formula with rice cereal (to help with reflux and spitting up) and a small amount of easy-to-digest baby food (check out Dr. Sears for a guide) and oatmeal. I don't let them stay awake more than two hours at a timebecause I find that's good for them right now. When tired Baby A rubs his eyes, Baby B gets fussy.
The hardest part about babies is there's no consistency. I know sooner than later they will change and my schedule, or attempt at a schedule, will change. I used to fear change and I am still not a fan but I need to go with the flow.
Although there's no consistency for me, babies love consistency. If you were in a strange land with strange people where everything was new ... wouldn't you want something to rely on? They are simple creatures so every night at 6 p.m. we do bath time, then a bottle with the lights turned down low and chill music on, then bedtime in their crib. Every single night. I put on their sound machine, which also has a projector, and humidifier and shut the door. They have come to rely on this and that is why they sleep more. It took some time but they've gotten the hang of this.
When I put them down for a nap and Baby B fusses I make myself do wimpy-cry-it-out because he needs to learn he is OK and will feel much better after his nap. Consistency. Every time they cry my or my husband's face is there.
So, get to know your kids and use that to build a consistent feeding and sleep schedule. Every baby is different because that's what makes them wonderful! Unique little creatures you created! Also, I hate this saying (I especially hated it about three months ago) but it gets better! It really does but it gets worse before it gets better.
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
Thursday, March 20, 2014
Reader Question: Baby gear, getting ready for twins
Checked my e-mail and, lo and behold, I got a question! My boys are napping (thank God) so I'll take a crack but ... please remember I'm far from an expert. I'm a stay-at-home mom of 23-week-old fraternal twin boys. Although, they are healthy so maybe I'm doing something right! At four months they were 27 inches and 16 pounds!
I read your blog as I am currently 32 weeks pregnant with identical twin boys. I am attempting to get ready for them and I was wondering if lthere was any sort of baby gear that you wished you'd known about before they got there? Any help would be greatly appreciated.
I don't have identicals so you might want to develop a system for telling them apart -- finger nail polish, different colored clothing ... my babies couldn't look more different (envision a pale redhead and an olive skinned brunette). It was hard enough remembering who I fed and who I didn't, I couldn't imagine if they looked the same. My suggestion would be to Google it and find a reputable site, I like Baby Center, and see if you like any suggestions.
Buy a clipboard and look online for a baby feeding chart. At their first checkup the nurse asked how many ounces they eat and how many diapers they go through in a day... I was like, say what!? It makes me feel like their nurse instead of mother but whatta gonna do? I started with one chart but found another I like better. http://www.vertex42.com/exceltemplates/baby-feeding-schedule.html -- I like this one because I can also chart sleeping/napping habits and write comments.
The first item that comes to mind is the Fisher Price Newborn Rock 'N' Play Sleeper. I wish we purchased these sooner because it was awesome -- sadly they outgrew them! It's inclined, which helped with acid reflux and spit-up, and is deep and cushioned, which made them feel cozy. It rocks and vibrates -- almost makes me want one for myself. I don't know how many nights I slept while rocking a baby with my foot. You can comfort your child without going quite as insane as you would have without it -- even my colicky baby liked this contraption!
Babies love routine. Every night we do a bath at 6 p.m. in Fisher Price Whale of A Tub, have a bottle, then they go down for the night with a humidifier running and their sound machine playing white noise. We tried the heartbeat noise but it felt like Edger Allan Poe's "The Telltale Heart." Our sound machine also has a projector with pictures of underwater animals.
We started with Avent bottles -- I think we got some at our baby shower. They were fine but our babies had, and still have, acid reflux and one of them is a mostly-happy spitter and those bottles leaked and sucked. I researched a better bottle and found Dr. Browns. They help keep the air out and have a wide mouthed kind that makes it easier when you put a scoop of formula in while holding a screaming baby with 1% patience. We have 10 bottles and I do a load of dishes every night. Remember, they only need formula/breastmilk and bottles for a year. Just a blip on the radar but the blip feels endless.
My husband's aunt helped for a week when they were small and bought us a Munchkin Deluxe Drying Rack. It's awesome for keeping bottles organized and easily accessible.
Stretchy pants (for them) are awesome for doing quick diaper changes. Whoever invented baby clothes with snaps ... watch your back because I'm coming for you! They are so frustrating.
I had the My Breast Friends Twin Pillow for breastfeeding -- I did it for four weeks (felt like four years). I stopped because my postpartum depression was awful and I needed chemical help. Twice the hormones with twins, twice the drop. Thankfully that only lasted a couple months and I'm chemical free (except wine/bourbon) but I didn't want to risk tainting my milk. If I were still breastfeeding I would solely pump and bottle feed. So much easier. Tandem feeding newborns was insane, especially with one who was, for lack of a better word, aggressive on the boob. For the women who did it, good for you! That's awesome but stop making me feel bad. I couldn't breastfeed longer and that's OK! My children won't have three eyes and I won't go nuts and be found naked, screaming on the freeway.
Also, have a postpartum depression buddy and don't be afraid to ask for help. Sitting around a table with my in-laws (who helped us so much) and husband while talking about my depression was awkward and I felt like a bad mother but it was worth it and they understood.
Velcro swaddle sleepers are awesome. I wish we used them more because I'm not the best swaddler and tiny babies love to be swaddled ... well except for one of my twins. You need to stay organized and have a system down so a Velcro swaddler takes a few steps out of your routine. Much appreciated!
We have two Fisher Price My Little Snuggle Bunny Bouncy Chairs, which are great, especially for feeding at the same time, but now their legs hang off. Recently someone gave us a Deluxe Take-Along-Swing and boy that thing is awesome. It has toys hanging on either side, to hold their attention, and it folds up for easy travel ... like we go anywhere! It has a light/music thingy but they don't seem to like that part because, honestly, it's like a night club ... you know, when we mamas were young and hip enough to party at night outside our house! Now I just want to go to bed. Anyway, it obviously swings and is great.
Cribs ... they slept in their car seats for about month or so before we got Rock 'N' Plays so ... yeah, cribs can wait until the 3-month mark but I recommend convertible toddler beds to save money down the road. We have two Pack 'N' Plays with bassinets and they napped together in there for the first couple months when they actually napped! I now only have one Pack 'N' Play downstairs (I keep the other at my in-laws). I used it to do wimpy-cry-it-out with one of my babies but now he naps in his crib. I figure if I put it away I will need to use it so I keep it up.
I also have a Baby Bjorn and an Ergo Baby but haven't used them much this winter. I have a Contours Options LT Tandem Stroller which is fine ... was having trouble with it today but I need to read the manual to figure out how to adjust the seats.
For most of our baby stuff, if not all, we used Amazon for ratings and customer reviews. Definitely helped our choice.
If you are on Facebook please, oh please, join The Official Group of National Organization of Mothers of Twins Clubs, Inc. I know a lot of moms with singletons but hardly anyone with twins. Having twins is harder than having a singleton and much different, whether people want to admit it or not, so it was so nice to have a group I could chat with 24/7 for advice, suggestions and support. I think my first post was when the boys were two weeks old: "Please tell me it gets better because I am so lost right now."
I could go on but my best advice is get to know your babies and fly by the seat of your pants. The less the better ... babies are simple and want love, food, a clean diaper and consistency. Don't read too much online because you'll go insane. Every baby is different. I have a child who likes a pacifier, hates boppies, puts himself to sleep (more or less), likes to be down on the floor rolling around, and needs a good burp after a big feed. My other child isn't so keen on pacifiers, loves boppies, had to go through wimpy-cry-it-out, wants to be held, and spits up like a volcano even when he hasn't eaten for a couple hours. Have a sense of humor, remember they are trying to figure out how to be a person, and ... well, it's funny because I used to hate when people told me this, but it gets better. I used to want to give my boys back to ... whoever ... and thought I ruined my life but now I couldn't imagine life without them.
I read your blog as I am currently 32 weeks pregnant with identical twin boys. I am attempting to get ready for them and I was wondering if lthere was any sort of baby gear that you wished you'd known about before they got there? Any help would be greatly appreciated.
I don't have identicals so you might want to develop a system for telling them apart -- finger nail polish, different colored clothing ... my babies couldn't look more different (envision a pale redhead and an olive skinned brunette). It was hard enough remembering who I fed and who I didn't, I couldn't imagine if they looked the same. My suggestion would be to Google it and find a reputable site, I like Baby Center, and see if you like any suggestions.
Buy a clipboard and look online for a baby feeding chart. At their first checkup the nurse asked how many ounces they eat and how many diapers they go through in a day... I was like, say what!? It makes me feel like their nurse instead of mother but whatta gonna do? I started with one chart but found another I like better. http://www.vertex42.com/exceltemplates/baby-feeding-schedule.html -- I like this one because I can also chart sleeping/napping habits and write comments.
The first item that comes to mind is the Fisher Price Newborn Rock 'N' Play Sleeper. I wish we purchased these sooner because it was awesome -- sadly they outgrew them! It's inclined, which helped with acid reflux and spit-up, and is deep and cushioned, which made them feel cozy. It rocks and vibrates -- almost makes me want one for myself. I don't know how many nights I slept while rocking a baby with my foot. You can comfort your child without going quite as insane as you would have without it -- even my colicky baby liked this contraption!
Babies love routine. Every night we do a bath at 6 p.m. in Fisher Price Whale of A Tub, have a bottle, then they go down for the night with a humidifier running and their sound machine playing white noise. We tried the heartbeat noise but it felt like Edger Allan Poe's "The Telltale Heart." Our sound machine also has a projector with pictures of underwater animals.
We started with Avent bottles -- I think we got some at our baby shower. They were fine but our babies had, and still have, acid reflux and one of them is a mostly-happy spitter and those bottles leaked and sucked. I researched a better bottle and found Dr. Browns. They help keep the air out and have a wide mouthed kind that makes it easier when you put a scoop of formula in while holding a screaming baby with 1% patience. We have 10 bottles and I do a load of dishes every night. Remember, they only need formula/breastmilk and bottles for a year. Just a blip on the radar but the blip feels endless.
My husband's aunt helped for a week when they were small and bought us a Munchkin Deluxe Drying Rack. It's awesome for keeping bottles organized and easily accessible.
Stretchy pants (for them) are awesome for doing quick diaper changes. Whoever invented baby clothes with snaps ... watch your back because I'm coming for you! They are so frustrating.
I had the My Breast Friends Twin Pillow for breastfeeding -- I did it for four weeks (felt like four years). I stopped because my postpartum depression was awful and I needed chemical help. Twice the hormones with twins, twice the drop. Thankfully that only lasted a couple months and I'm chemical free (except wine/bourbon) but I didn't want to risk tainting my milk. If I were still breastfeeding I would solely pump and bottle feed. So much easier. Tandem feeding newborns was insane, especially with one who was, for lack of a better word, aggressive on the boob. For the women who did it, good for you! That's awesome but stop making me feel bad. I couldn't breastfeed longer and that's OK! My children won't have three eyes and I won't go nuts and be found naked, screaming on the freeway.
Also, have a postpartum depression buddy and don't be afraid to ask for help. Sitting around a table with my in-laws (who helped us so much) and husband while talking about my depression was awkward and I felt like a bad mother but it was worth it and they understood.
Velcro swaddle sleepers are awesome. I wish we used them more because I'm not the best swaddler and tiny babies love to be swaddled ... well except for one of my twins. You need to stay organized and have a system down so a Velcro swaddler takes a few steps out of your routine. Much appreciated!
We have two Fisher Price My Little Snuggle Bunny Bouncy Chairs, which are great, especially for feeding at the same time, but now their legs hang off. Recently someone gave us a Deluxe Take-Along-Swing and boy that thing is awesome. It has toys hanging on either side, to hold their attention, and it folds up for easy travel ... like we go anywhere! It has a light/music thingy but they don't seem to like that part because, honestly, it's like a night club ... you know, when we mamas were young and hip enough to party at night outside our house! Now I just want to go to bed. Anyway, it obviously swings and is great.
Cribs ... they slept in their car seats for about month or so before we got Rock 'N' Plays so ... yeah, cribs can wait until the 3-month mark but I recommend convertible toddler beds to save money down the road. We have two Pack 'N' Plays with bassinets and they napped together in there for the first couple months when they actually napped! I now only have one Pack 'N' Play downstairs (I keep the other at my in-laws). I used it to do wimpy-cry-it-out with one of my babies but now he naps in his crib. I figure if I put it away I will need to use it so I keep it up.
I also have a Baby Bjorn and an Ergo Baby but haven't used them much this winter. I have a Contours Options LT Tandem Stroller which is fine ... was having trouble with it today but I need to read the manual to figure out how to adjust the seats.
For most of our baby stuff, if not all, we used Amazon for ratings and customer reviews. Definitely helped our choice.
If you are on Facebook please, oh please, join The Official Group of National Organization of Mothers of Twins Clubs, Inc. I know a lot of moms with singletons but hardly anyone with twins. Having twins is harder than having a singleton and much different, whether people want to admit it or not, so it was so nice to have a group I could chat with 24/7 for advice, suggestions and support. I think my first post was when the boys were two weeks old: "Please tell me it gets better because I am so lost right now."
I could go on but my best advice is get to know your babies and fly by the seat of your pants. The less the better ... babies are simple and want love, food, a clean diaper and consistency. Don't read too much online because you'll go insane. Every baby is different. I have a child who likes a pacifier, hates boppies, puts himself to sleep (more or less), likes to be down on the floor rolling around, and needs a good burp after a big feed. My other child isn't so keen on pacifiers, loves boppies, had to go through wimpy-cry-it-out, wants to be held, and spits up like a volcano even when he hasn't eaten for a couple hours. Have a sense of humor, remember they are trying to figure out how to be a person, and ... well, it's funny because I used to hate when people told me this, but it gets better. I used to want to give my boys back to ... whoever ... and thought I ruined my life but now I couldn't imagine life without them.
Tuesday, March 18, 2014
Five Month Old Fraternal Twin Boys: Questions, Comments From The Peanut Gallery
I don't know if any readers are interested -- or if I have regular readers -- but if you have questions or comments you want discussed please e-mail me at doloresprice80@gmail.com. I'd love to get a conversation going!
Five Month Old Twins - Sleep, perchance to dream: Naps, naps, naps
A baby is crying. He's in the bassinet of a pack-n-play, where he napped for about 20 minutes. Obviously he awoke, remembering he's not with me on the floor of the living room, kicking his legs, spitting up all over and having a gay old time. Oh wait ... he stopped crying. I want to take a peek but don't know if he fell asleep or found something shiny for his wondering eyes because if the second reason is the case he will start bawling when he sees my big face.
Life through a baby's eyes. Creepy. One minute you're just waking up, the next minute a huge face appears from nowhere. Life must be one huge magic trick to babies. Huge monsters walking around while you wiggle on the floor. People making the cute-baby-face with their wide-eyed, wide-mouthed exclamations. Loud noises ... I could go on because everything is new to them. My twins are 23 weeks so they haven't been outside the womb longer than they've been inside. My mind is blown, which doesn't take much because I'm tired.
So, I rolled the dice and he's asleep. THANK THE LORD, SWEET JESUS. I like when they nap and leave me the hell alone a few times a day. Does that make me a bad mother? I don't care. However, how much should a baby nap?
I'm supposed to work towards two big naps a day -- morning and afternoon -- and I'm supposed to establish regular nap times. Right? I established a set bedtime routine: bath at 6 p.m. then you get butt pasted, diapered and lotioned up before footie pajamas, then Zantac, Tylenol if needed (welcome to Teething Central ladies and gentleman), a bottle, baby food (currently enjoying apples), then 1, 2, 3 ... down for the count. What about naps? Right now it's about every two hours. I don't set my watch by it, instead I look for cues. Baby A rubs his eyes, Baby B fusses. Also, I recently started not getting them from their nap unless they cry for more than five minutes because they often will go back to sleep for a while.
Baby B usually naps downstairs in his pack-n-play while Baby A is upstairs in his crib. Yesterday Baby B did well transitioning to his crib but not-so-much today. Problem with twins is while Baby B was wiggin' out, I didn't want Baby A to wake up. I know I should have made Baby B figure it out in his crib while assuring him everything is gonna be alright mon, but one upset baby is better than two. So, I tried to rock him but he wasn't having it so downstairs we went to his pack-n-play for a two minute cry before slumber.
Sigh. Is it 5 o'clock yet? On another note, for the moms of singletons in my life: the advice is appreciated but with a taste of annoyance because you don't know what it's like to have two babies at once and never will. Please, oh please, stop pretending you do because it ain't the same.
Life through a baby's eyes. Creepy. One minute you're just waking up, the next minute a huge face appears from nowhere. Life must be one huge magic trick to babies. Huge monsters walking around while you wiggle on the floor. People making the cute-baby-face with their wide-eyed, wide-mouthed exclamations. Loud noises ... I could go on because everything is new to them. My twins are 23 weeks so they haven't been outside the womb longer than they've been inside. My mind is blown, which doesn't take much because I'm tired.
So, I rolled the dice and he's asleep. THANK THE LORD, SWEET JESUS. I like when they nap and leave me the hell alone a few times a day. Does that make me a bad mother? I don't care. However, how much should a baby nap?
I'm supposed to work towards two big naps a day -- morning and afternoon -- and I'm supposed to establish regular nap times. Right? I established a set bedtime routine: bath at 6 p.m. then you get butt pasted, diapered and lotioned up before footie pajamas, then Zantac, Tylenol if needed (welcome to Teething Central ladies and gentleman), a bottle, baby food (currently enjoying apples), then 1, 2, 3 ... down for the count. What about naps? Right now it's about every two hours. I don't set my watch by it, instead I look for cues. Baby A rubs his eyes, Baby B fusses. Also, I recently started not getting them from their nap unless they cry for more than five minutes because they often will go back to sleep for a while.
Baby B usually naps downstairs in his pack-n-play while Baby A is upstairs in his crib. Yesterday Baby B did well transitioning to his crib but not-so-much today. Problem with twins is while Baby B was wiggin' out, I didn't want Baby A to wake up. I know I should have made Baby B figure it out in his crib while assuring him everything is gonna be alright mon, but one upset baby is better than two. So, I tried to rock him but he wasn't having it so downstairs we went to his pack-n-play for a two minute cry before slumber.
Sigh. Is it 5 o'clock yet? On another note, for the moms of singletons in my life: the advice is appreciated but with a taste of annoyance because you don't know what it's like to have two babies at once and never will. Please, oh please, stop pretending you do because it ain't the same.
Monday, March 17, 2014
Five Month Old Twins: Oh God, one of them has a tooth
I am a stay-at-home mother of fraternal boys and Lord All Mighty I went on vacation last week. My husband had a work conference in Nashville, Tenn. (a plane ride away) and I tagged along while my in-laws watched the boys. I looked forward to the trip, and felt guilty for looking forward to the trip, but here I sit and it's as if I never went. Cest la vie.
However, I was glad to come home to my monsters. Had they changed? Grown an inch or gained a pound? Hard to tell but my youngest (by one minute) sprouted a tooth! So, that's why he's been fussing for 300 years! Tomorrow they will be 23 weeks so it's a tad early on the judgmental Baby Scale, especially since they were three weeks early, but babies reach milestones whenever the hell they want!
Hopefully his brother, Senor No Tooth, has been fussy lately because he, also, is sprouting a tooth. That's my answer for fussiness -- they are either teething or tired. I don't like to think it could be anything else, like RSV or a mysterious illness, because I ain't got time for that.
So, my boys were sleeping through the night (7 p.m.-ish to 4:30 a.m. or 5:30 a.m.-ish) but after our trip they are taking us back in time when nighttime was not the right time for sleep. Last night they woke at 2 a.m. Needless to say, hubby and I weren't x's and o's because we were tired!
I know many of you are pissed because I'm complaining about babies who slept for 7 hours instead of 9 hours or more. Honestly, I don't care because you get used to your situation, especially in a Twiniverse, and it's not like I go to bed at 7 p.m. along with them because mama needs some time alone! Every night is hopeful, especially since I need energy to wrangle little old men all day. I went from feeding every three hours (thinking how easy this was) to feeding every 2-3 hours but they wouldn't go back to sleep to slowly creeping to where we are now. I've lived the dark days of maybe one hour of sleep a night so hold your sass for an episode of Maury. Considering the baby with the tooth ate more food than usual today, I figure it's another growth spurt.
Ugh.
My babies are wearing 12 month clothing and, at their 4-month checkup, were 75% for weight and 97% for height. I feel guilty because many twin moms aren't so lucky so I don't talk about it much. The only downside is they are hungrier than they can hold. One of my boys is a happy spitter so most of it lands on me, the floor, his clothing, the back of his neck, his beloved bunny stuffed animal, and so on. We are trying out baby food, which is a slow process. I remind myself formula, feeding them baby food by fingertip, and other nonsense is a blip on the radar of life. Hard to remember when your son spits carrots in your face but true nonetheless.
Oh it's a carnival, a lonely circus with pathetic acts like the Incredibly Saggy Soft Body Lady Who Occasionally Cries In The Bathroom and The Baby Who Spits In Faces. However, it's my life and one of the things keeping me going is realizing it's constantly changing, they are constantly growing and I will have a life again. Also, bedtime is at 7 p.m. and wine time is at 7:01. Everything is better with wine.
However, I was glad to come home to my monsters. Had they changed? Grown an inch or gained a pound? Hard to tell but my youngest (by one minute) sprouted a tooth! So, that's why he's been fussing for 300 years! Tomorrow they will be 23 weeks so it's a tad early on the judgmental Baby Scale, especially since they were three weeks early, but babies reach milestones whenever the hell they want!
Hopefully his brother, Senor No Tooth, has been fussy lately because he, also, is sprouting a tooth. That's my answer for fussiness -- they are either teething or tired. I don't like to think it could be anything else, like RSV or a mysterious illness, because I ain't got time for that.
So, my boys were sleeping through the night (7 p.m.-ish to 4:30 a.m. or 5:30 a.m.-ish) but after our trip they are taking us back in time when nighttime was not the right time for sleep. Last night they woke at 2 a.m. Needless to say, hubby and I weren't x's and o's because we were tired!
I know many of you are pissed because I'm complaining about babies who slept for 7 hours instead of 9 hours or more. Honestly, I don't care because you get used to your situation, especially in a Twiniverse, and it's not like I go to bed at 7 p.m. along with them because mama needs some time alone! Every night is hopeful, especially since I need energy to wrangle little old men all day. I went from feeding every three hours (thinking how easy this was) to feeding every 2-3 hours but they wouldn't go back to sleep to slowly creeping to where we are now. I've lived the dark days of maybe one hour of sleep a night so hold your sass for an episode of Maury. Considering the baby with the tooth ate more food than usual today, I figure it's another growth spurt.
Ugh.
My babies are wearing 12 month clothing and, at their 4-month checkup, were 75% for weight and 97% for height. I feel guilty because many twin moms aren't so lucky so I don't talk about it much. The only downside is they are hungrier than they can hold. One of my boys is a happy spitter so most of it lands on me, the floor, his clothing, the back of his neck, his beloved bunny stuffed animal, and so on. We are trying out baby food, which is a slow process. I remind myself formula, feeding them baby food by fingertip, and other nonsense is a blip on the radar of life. Hard to remember when your son spits carrots in your face but true nonetheless.
Oh it's a carnival, a lonely circus with pathetic acts like the Incredibly Saggy Soft Body Lady Who Occasionally Cries In The Bathroom and The Baby Who Spits In Faces. However, it's my life and one of the things keeping me going is realizing it's constantly changing, they are constantly growing and I will have a life again. Also, bedtime is at 7 p.m. and wine time is at 7:01. Everything is better with wine.
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
Almost Five Month Old Twins: Unappreciated, overwhelmed, in need of silence
Warning: This is a bitter entry from a tired stay-at-home mother of twins. You have been warned.
One baby is in an open, rainbow colored, flying saucer contraption. He's bouncing, drooling and enjoying himself. I give him 2 minutes because he's working on a bowel movement. Nothing can ruin a good time like poopy. The other baby is doing Tummy Time while unleashing a high-pitched wail. I'm supposed to be doing these activities so they develop strength to crawl, and later walk, but do I want them to do that? Two whiny, nutty babies on the move?
As a stay-at-home mom of almost 5-month-old twins, I have no alone time yet I'm constantly lonely. There's wonderful things, like when they're upset I can comfort them (most of the time), the giggles, snuggles and smiles, and the unexpected snorts and nerdy laughs. However, with the good there's bad: fussiness, not being able to comfort them because I don't know what's wrong, the constant need for attention, poopy diapers, the look of betrayal at naptime, when your husband returns from work and you want him to take over so you can have a moment alone yet he wants peace and quiet after a long day at work. How can you compare who works harder?
It feels endless because it is. It's the hardest thing I've ever done. Today I had to do something I haven't had to do for weeks - go in the bathroom, shut the door and sob. I cried for my former life, as if it was fabulous, for my changing and strained relationship with my husband, for my sanity, for my soft and stretched roly-poly body, because I'd pushed myself too hard. I've been up since 5:30 a.m. and up part of the night tending to grumpy, mute old men and I'm tired. I watch as the UPS man drives by, wishing for a pick-me-up: a bouquet of flowers, box of chocolates, anything that shows someone cares but no one stops. I sit in my house, the house I've sat in for months and realize the UPS man will never stop. No one will surprise me with a day to myself or a trip to the beauty parlor, something only for me. As wives and mothers, we're supposed to put on makeup and a smile before our husbands return from work. Why? What about us? Why doesn't anyone think about us? No, I don't sit at home all day, watching daytime TV and eating bon-bons and anyone who thinks that is delusional. I can either cry or get over it because I have one baby crying and the other about to cry. When did I become last on the list and why do I have to stay there?
One baby is in an open, rainbow colored, flying saucer contraption. He's bouncing, drooling and enjoying himself. I give him 2 minutes because he's working on a bowel movement. Nothing can ruin a good time like poopy. The other baby is doing Tummy Time while unleashing a high-pitched wail. I'm supposed to be doing these activities so they develop strength to crawl, and later walk, but do I want them to do that? Two whiny, nutty babies on the move?
As a stay-at-home mom of almost 5-month-old twins, I have no alone time yet I'm constantly lonely. There's wonderful things, like when they're upset I can comfort them (most of the time), the giggles, snuggles and smiles, and the unexpected snorts and nerdy laughs. However, with the good there's bad: fussiness, not being able to comfort them because I don't know what's wrong, the constant need for attention, poopy diapers, the look of betrayal at naptime, when your husband returns from work and you want him to take over so you can have a moment alone yet he wants peace and quiet after a long day at work. How can you compare who works harder?
It feels endless because it is. It's the hardest thing I've ever done. Today I had to do something I haven't had to do for weeks - go in the bathroom, shut the door and sob. I cried for my former life, as if it was fabulous, for my changing and strained relationship with my husband, for my sanity, for my soft and stretched roly-poly body, because I'd pushed myself too hard. I've been up since 5:30 a.m. and up part of the night tending to grumpy, mute old men and I'm tired. I watch as the UPS man drives by, wishing for a pick-me-up: a bouquet of flowers, box of chocolates, anything that shows someone cares but no one stops. I sit in my house, the house I've sat in for months and realize the UPS man will never stop. No one will surprise me with a day to myself or a trip to the beauty parlor, something only for me. As wives and mothers, we're supposed to put on makeup and a smile before our husbands return from work. Why? What about us? Why doesn't anyone think about us? No, I don't sit at home all day, watching daytime TV and eating bon-bons and anyone who thinks that is delusional. I can either cry or get over it because I have one baby crying and the other about to cry. When did I become last on the list and why do I have to stay there?
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