Nine Month Old Fraternal Twin Boys: Embrace The Chaos

Life is funny when you are a stay-at-home mom of nine month old twins.
I was sitting here last night after the boys went to sleep (7 p.m. bedtime) thinking to myself wow, I haven't written a blog post in a really, really long time. In actuality, as I found out today, it's only been a month. Why on Earth did it feel like months upon months? It's because that's what this lifestyle will do to you.
Wake up around 6-6:30ish. My husband holds their wiggly bodies as I try to make bottles as quickly as possible. They eat then sit in their activity chairs while I make breakfast and my husband's lunch. He sets up The Octagon (North States Superyard gated play-thingy-ma-bob) before leaving for work. The boys and I play for a little (I'm referee) before Second Breakfast (baby food, oatmeal, yogurt). Then it's nap time for us three Bozos (yes, I nap too). Hopefully I can get about an hour, usually less, sometimes more. On those unfortunate days where one naps much longer than the other, our schedule is funky. Then it's repeat for bottles, activity chairs, Octagon, lunch, then nap time.
I try to keep to the schedule. Sometimes keeping them up a little longer, sometimes not. After their second nap it's bottles and play time then, if the weather is good, we go for a long walk (4-5 miles). Otherwise the elusive third nap is hard to come by because they love sleeping in their stroller, not so much their crib this late in the day.
Then it's dinner, bath time, bottle and bedtime for Bonzos at 7 p.m. In the back of my mind I hope they stay asleep.
Schedule, schedule, schedule - only mothers of multiples understand this I've come to find out.
The boys are in transition from baby food to solid food. We (as in me) started baby food at six months and slowly increased their intake every month (can you tell I'm a little meticulous? Wasn't before I had twins!). Now we were told (by the pediatrician) to buy the same foods they've been eating (sweet potatoes, peas, green beans, carrots, bananas, pears ... ) and cook them and/or mash them up so they are easier to eat.
Every few months I feel uneasy, as I do now. Just when I think I'm getting the hang of something, when I have a system down, when I'm feeling empowered, then change comes. It may be small, it may be large (like giving birth to twins!) but it comes and I must face it head on. They started sitting up, then crawling, then pulling themselves up, now they are hurling themselves forward trying to walk and using me as a jungle gym. Apparently every item in my home is something to chew on for them! "Hmm ... what is this thing? Can I chew on it? Oooo I can chew on it! Yum!" I am also under the sneaking suspicion they are constantly teething (Baby A has six teeth and Baby B is working on his seventh!).
However, it's all part of the process. Embrace the chaos. Embrace the chaos. Scream into a pillow during nap time. Embrace the chaos.

Eight Month Old Fraternal Twin Boys: Please Let Me Know If I've Gone Insane, Thanks

My twin sons are eight months old and I just used a knife to spread peanut butter on pieces of dark chocolate. I ate four pieces -- I'm talking about the king size Hershey's dark chocolate bar so these pieces ain't petite. Am I proud of myself? Not particularly but god almighty I may be losing my mind. No it's not because of the snack I just ate, which I saw a woman eat on an episode of "Cooking Yourself Thin." Of course she ate crap like that but still looked better than me. My body resembles a balloon filled with cottage cheese -- it's not that bad but don't women love to self-hate.
Anyway, I believe I'm losing it because I often don't know what month it is, let alone day. It feels like I'm running a never-ending marathon, racing towards what? A finish line? What's the finish line? I try to fit in things I enjoy or housework in between naps but I find it often leaves me exhausted and, honestly, I don't know what I enjoy anymore.
Sigh.
Day-in-day-out activities are hard enough but then something is thrown into the mix. During the boys midday nap yesterday I took the free time to cook hamburgers -- all you busy moms out there, cook bulk meat ahead of time and you have your protein for many meals in advance! Anyway, turns out the tinfoil I used had a tear because, before I knew it, I noticed smoke. I went into the kitchen and it was foggy. The smoke alarm went off and, of course, woke the boys from their nap. Can I never win? Then that night, when getting their bedroom ready before sleepytime (closing blinds, turning on sound machine), I noticed a bunch of flies hanging out on one of their windows. Seriously disgusting. Long story short, I think someone left the sliding glass door open downstairs and a bunch of flies got in and threw a party at the window getting the most sunlight.
I can't make this stuff up.My husband comes home from work looking like a GQ model and I look like something that crawled out of a sewer. Well, that's a little dramatic but girl I don't look good with my Walmart pajama pants, my tank top from .... well I don't know when or where this was purchased, my greasy glasses and equally greasy hair. I know this is a blip on the radar and I'll probably look back and laugh but I don't have a life, I don't have a identity. I feel like I'm not a person with thoughts, feelings and worth but a slave who must obey and never rest. I'm not allowed to feel because I still have to take care of my kids, whether I'm depressed or not. I must be selfless because they are itty bitty babies who need me.
Sorry for the pessimism but motherhood isn't always fabulous. However, my boys will be nine months old in eight days. Baby A is sitting up and yelling "Baa baa baa" often and Baby B has six teeth (Baby A has two) and is pulling himself up on anything and everything. They're happy (most of the time) and healthy so at least I'm doing something right!

Eight Month Old Fraternal Twins: Pulling Up On Furniture As My Sanity Weakens

I have eight month old fraternal twin boys -- 36 weeks if we're getting technical. Baby A continues to Army crawl as a means of travel. Baby B ... well he's a different story because even though they are twins they are still different babies. Baby B is pulling himself up on furniture and wobbling his way through life.
Frightening.
Last week he woke us up around 5 a.m. and I went in his room to find him standing in his crib, holding on to the side. What the heck?!? He loves to practice his new trick until he's exhausted.
I finally understand mothers who told me they loved the newborn stage. I wanted to scream in their face as I functioned on a few hours of sleep and struggled to care for a colicky newborn and his loveable but stubborn brother. However, now I somewhat understand. There was a silver lining in the newborn stage: you put them down and they stay there. Yeah, you were exhausted, hormonal and delirious but at least they stayed put.
Now, I was OK with crawling but this new stage resembles death-defying stunts. His legs shake unsteadily yet he slowly continues upward, pulling himself up on the couch, pack n play, activity center ... whatever he can find. He attempts to move sideways like a trapeze artist, slowly grabbing the furniture next to him.
When I put him down for a nap he pulls himself up to a standing position at least five times. My new workout is going downstairs, waiting until he fusses because he knows how to pull himself up but not sit back down, then walking up the stairs, taking his hands and showing him how to bend his knees and sit. Then I go back downstairs and wait for him to fuss again. I can feel the baby weight shedding off my body like a dog shedding hair in the summer! Or not.
Anyway, my husband purchased a play yard off Amazon that's 26 inches high and 34 square feet -- I wish my high school math teacher listened as we attempted to measure their current play area and figure out its square feet. For shame! The play yard can be used indoors and out.
However, I still am confused about this stage. Should I follow him around like a helicopter parent, making sure he doesn't fall and hurt himself - I've saved him from bumps and bruises too many times to count already. Or should I let him figure it out on his own? The problem is I feel like I am neglecting his brother who quietly plays with toys and crawls around. I figure he's old enough to do something, hurt himself, and figure out he shouldn't do that again or is he not old enough yet?
Ah yes the saga continues. Just when I was feeling confident in my mothering abilities one of them has to go and learn a new and dangerous trick. Yikes.

Almost Eight Month Old Fraternal Twins: Crawling Critters On The Move

My fraternal sons will be eight months old Sunday. I feel like they've been almost eight months old for 8,000 years. We are slowly inching to the one-year ... well, it's not a finish line but it definitely will be a milestone. Well, I'm inching but my sons are crawling, everywhere!
They've been crawling for a while now but their speed recently quickened. They can no longer use bouncy chairs as they learned how to sit up and attempt to escape. No bueno for mama. So, we went from one Baby Einstein activity center thing-a-ma-bob to two. Bouncy, bouncy, bouncy. This new one, bought yesterday, has sound so let's see how long it takes before that drives me nuts.
Yesterday Baby B attempted to pull himself up and, for about 30 seconds, was successful. Frightening. Part of me wants to keep them in the activity centers all the ding dong day but the other, louder part knows it's good for them to crawl around, learn boundaries and get exercise.
Sigh.
I'm out of my league here and overwhelmed. They are also eating baby food three times a day and I've asked advice from friends, family and my doctor but still feel like I'm winging motherhood. It's so crazy I'm allowed to be in charge, I can hardly believe it sometimes.
Just when I got comfortable, things changed. I have a feeling this will happen again and again and again.

Almost Eight Month Old Fraternal Twins: Having A Birthday When You're A Mom

I am a stay-at-home mother of almost eight month old fraternal twins and today is my birthday. It's my first birthday where it's not about me.
My day was basically the same except my husband gave me a couple gifts this morning and I get to eat an unhealthy meal tonight - usually we save the bad-for-you food for the weekend. I also got Facebook birthday greetings from my online friends.
Last year I was pregnant so it was an usual birthday (i.e. sans alcohol) but not completely different like this year. When I was pregnant people told me to soak up the love because once the babies came out people wouldn't care about you anymore. I didn't think much about this because I was more focused on growing humans inside me! I'm sure I've felt unnoticed over the past eight months but it wasn't until my birthday that I finally felt like the invisible woman.
I am the invisible woman. I am braless in pajamas with dried oatmeal on my shirt. My hair is falling out of the bun I put it in at 5 a.m. I have not brushed my teeth or washed my face.
I am listening to the baby monitor, waiting for Baby B to wake since he's been asleep almost two hours. Sounds nice, right? Wrong. I have twins. Just because Baby B snoozes doesn't mean Baby A snoozes. They went down for their first nap together but Baby B decided 30 minutes was adequate while Baby A went for the hour-and-a-half snoozeapalooza. So their schedule is off today. As far as the second nap of the day, Baby A has only been napping for a half an hour. When's my nap? No nap for invisible with food to cook, laundry to do, blah blah blah. The coffee is coursing through my veins at a slow purr.
I figure if I started writing this blog, Baby B would wake but he's still asleep.
Did I say I was tired? Women told me in a couple years I'll have my birthdays back, whatever that means. It's hard to come to terms with this but I won't have anything back. Nothing is coming back. No 9-5 hustle with carefree weekends. No lazy wondering what to make for dinner and lounging while watching a television show in the evening. I can hardly make it to 8:30 p.m. but, in a cruel twist, can't fall asleep until at least 10 p.m. No sleeping in. No wandering around Target for fun. Do I want it back? No, especially if that means giving up my children. I love them so much love isn't the word to capture the feeling. Do I miss being carefree, or at least reminiscing on how carefree my life was even though I didn't know at the time? Of course I do.
Happy birthday to mommy, happy birthday to me.

Seven Month Old Fraternal Twins: Don't Give Up Hope

My sons are closing in on the eight-month mark. They are smiling, laughing, chatty little creatures who can crawl and roll and bring me more joy than I thought possible. They can also drive me nuts.
Case in point, they started waking up an hour earlier than usual.
Now, I want to get one thing clear. I understand some women have babies (or a baby) who don't sleep through the night for a long time. My sister complained her youngest didn't sleep through the night (I don't mean a five-hour stretch, I mean through the night) until she was a year old. Although I feel bad for parents who are still being woken up in the night, I have my own fish to fry. I have a hard time remembering things could be worse when I am tired and grouchy at 5 a.m. I don't see anything wrong with this. Over the past seven, almost eight, months I changed dramatically but that's one area I won't change.
My sons were sleeping from about 6:30-7 p.m. (sometimes 7:30) until 6 a.m. (we even had a 6:30 a.m. once!) I'd rather wake up naturally when my body decides I've rested long enough but I'll take the 6 a.m. because ... well ... I have to take it because it's my life. Over the past few days the boys started waking at 5 a.m. Nothing in their lives changed within the past few days.
Insert baby guessing game.
Instead of months ago when I was dealing with a colicy baby, the question moves from, "Why is my baby crying?" to "Why is my baby waking up earlier?" Growth spurt? Need more food? One baby is waking the other up? Karma for being a sarcastic smart ass? Why? Why? Why?
Thank God for sixth grade when I learned the scientific method. Before I freak out and give up let's take a moment and think. It's easy to react without thinking but I've learned when it comes to babies, it's smart to take a moment and think things through.
My children eat every three hours. When they wake up they're offered 8 ounces of formula and sometimes don't drink it all. Every three hours they are offered food, with a vegetable, fruit and oatmeal offered three times a day. How do I know this? I am a stay-at-home mom and am the one doing the offering. They go down for a nap in their cribs after being awake for two hours. Every night at 6 p.m. they are given a bath and their last food of the day before it's bedtime for Bonzo(s). Schedule, schedule, schedule!
So, I don't want to make a rookie mistake and change something dramatic right now. The only thing I can figure is they are hungry, hence the waking up earlier to feed. Instead of three spoonfuls of each food three times a day I am upping it to four. If that's too much then they won't eat as much formula. Now, my sister who I sometimes thinks believes she is Mother Nature in human form, advised me you don't really need to feed them baby food until they are a year old, breast is best. She don't have twins so me no care. My babies are off the charts for size and weight so they need more than formula and the food helps my spitter-upper not spit up so much.
We will see how it goes today and tomorrow morning with the extra food. All you can do is think things through and hope for the best!

Seven Month Old Twins: To Drink Or Not To Drink, That Is The Question

I am a stay-at-home mother of seven month old twins. After putting my babies to bed around 7-7:30, a drink sounds good. It sounds really good. Alas, I don't often partake because it doesn't help.
At the beginning of my pregnancy I missed alcohol. I was a bit of a weekend wino pre-baby and the thought of no alcohol for nine months was daunting. However, after a few months my cravings went from Pinot Noir to food, food, food. I was interested in eating and sleeping.
After giving birth to twins last October - I still find this hard to believe - I had a beer once after breastfeeding and it did not help my post partum depression, which I wasn't aware I was suffering from. After dealing with my issues, with the help of a supportive family and Zoloft, I was back sans anti-depressants but with a taste for Chardonnay. I had a glass or two every night. It was helpful for the hour or so I consumed them, especially after long days, but wasn't so helpful afterwards when my sleep was affected.
In an attempt to support my weight loss regime, I switched from wine to vodka tonics. I didn't think I could go without alcohol because being a mother of twins is the hardest thing I have ever done. Again, same scenario. Helped me relax for an hour or two but then it didn't help my sleep.
Now, here I sit in the land of Live-And-Learn-Twin-Parenting and I don't drink during the week. Yes, I'm still tired in the morning but I try to get out for a walk with the boys or a run solo to help my stress level. I know it's better for me and better for the boys. On the weekend I might have one or two drinks a night but that's about my limit. Sometimes I slip up and have a drink during the week but it isn't often.
The mix of drinking and parenting is similar to parenting itself. My children are different from your children and I need to find out, often the hard way, what works for them. Some mothers have a glass or two of booze a night and it helps them. That's great! I'm happy for all the good mamas out there getting time to relax because we deserve it! Some mothers don't partake. That's great too! To each their own but think about what's best for you and best for your child.
Yes, I could use a drink right now but instead I'm going to bed. The boys and I went for a 5-mile walk today and I feel pretty good. Do I feel great? No! I'm a stay-at-home mom of twin babies who are on the move. However, I feel OK and that works for me!
I'm sure in a few months or a year I will return to a glass of wine a night, when things aren't as stressful. Key word is as because it will always be stressful. However, right now the boys need my full and undivided attention and often need me during the night once or twice. It's hard to believe, and especially hard to remember, they are changing every day. They will one day, sooner than later, play together and not need me to constantly feed, burp, soothe and keep them from danger. Mind boggling.